Wednesday, February 1, 2017

neo-Nazi cum dumpster KellIe Leitch surprised that people are acting on the hate she's incited

Timeline of a science fiction story, if only people who read that genre believed in such nonsense being possible:

1. Kellie Leitch realizes she could win a whole pile of extra votes by campaigning on an "I'm Canada's Trump" platform.

2. Kellie Leitch says she doesn't mind if racists are supporting her, and thus begins her new strategy of lovingly taking neo-Nazi cum in her ass.

3. Even by the end of the year, she's still pumping her "Canadian values" platform. In this case, "Canadian values" includes getting your loose ass pumped full of neo-Nazi cum, as well of course as anything else that Conservatives typically stand for, like destroying the country's economy.

4. Whereupon her campaign strategy of taking neo-Nazi cum in every hole starts paying off, as the endorsements from neo-Nazi groups start rolling in.

5. Even last week, her campaign manager freaks out on a constitutional scholar, using neo-Nazi slang that (in my hometown) would get his face stomped off his puny little body. Which is especially funny cos this clown Kouvalis isn't even Aryan: he's from what the neo-Nazis call "one of the swarthy mud-races", and thus he should probably keep his fucking mouth shut, he's just making himself look stupid.

6. Til finally someone guns down people in a mosque in Quebec, and Canadian values respond by putting some of the blame where it belongs: on her and her neo-Nazi campaign manager and her neo-Nazi following. Then, suddenly, she doesn't like Canadian values so much.

Dear Kellie Leitch: I'm all for Canadian values. I just think you don't have the slightest fucking clue what they are, and I would never let you be in charge of deciding them.

Everyone else says you're just mouthing the words to try to win the leadership.

I disagree. I'll accept at face value your self-portrayal as a neo-Nazi cum dumpster til you prove otherwise.

The number 1 universal Canadian value, shared by every Canadian who's not from fucking Alberta, is this:


Monday, January 30, 2017

Trumptards beginning to realize it ain't all so easy

Business Insider - turns out all that wall talk has a price. Guess who's the largest trading partner of every US state that abuts Mexico?

Mexico. Yes, Mexico is the largest trading partner of Texas, Arizona, California and New Mexico.

And now US cities on the Mexican border are starting to hurt, as all them Mexican shoppers stay home.

Business Insider - turns out banning people by country of origin has a price. Guess how many companies have high-level staff of Iranian, Syrian, etc. origin?

Most of them. So now they gotta figure out how to telepresence their comptroller to that important meeting in Toronto because if he actually goes there in person, he won't be allowed back in the US.

Turns out voting for Trump has a price!

Some headline suggestions for Akbar the Bangladeshi Reuters Headline Writer

Some suggested headlines for today:




I guess a Republican president doesn't mean To Da Moon Alice after all, eh?

Wonder when they'll clue in that the Republicans are the party that always causes recessions and economic crises....

Sunday, January 29, 2017

Amazingly, people are still piddling their panties

Bespoke - snap out of it, you pussies!

Apparently, bullish sentiment remains below 50%, even with Lord Piddles in charge of the US economy.

Take that how you will:

A) People should be buying like nuts! Piddles is going to eliminate all regulations and make it easier to do business!

B) Sell, sell, sell! Every time a Republican has been in charge he's fucked up the USD economy. You'll be able to buy S&P at 1000 before Trump is done. The only question is whether there will still be an America.