Monday, March 10, 2014

Some Monday news

The US markets seem to be freaking out inconclusively, what with this being the five-year anniversary of the 666 bottom and the pussies' inability to just be thankful the market is still going up.

I am concerned that the metals are taking on the stench of dooooom.

Here's some newsreading:

Liz-Ann Sonders - market snapshot. She's doing video instead of old-fashioned typing now. Thankfully, you can still see the transcript and the slides. She goes into a lot of detail. You should pay attention to her.

Reformed Borker (Bork Bork Bork!) - on the Feb jobs report. He notes that college grads are essentially at full employment now, and points out that the increase in hourly earnings is very good for the US outlook. So why this pussy doesn't just shut up with his whining and buy SPY is beyond me.

Ritholtz - five years ago today I switched from bear to bull because the evidence told me to. Big Barry on his bottom-tick buy call from 2009. If only more people could get their heads out of their asses, look around them, and see the real world.

der Spargel - Europe stressed by upcoming stress tests. Maybe this'll cause some relative underperformance for core Europe over these next few weeks? And here's a funny quote:
"Supposedly, the ECB intends to fail 30 banks to establish credibility," says Dirk Becker, an analyst with Kepler Cheuvreux in Frankfurt. "If that is true, it could get dicey for German institutions as well, such as Commerzbank, HSH Nordbank or Nord/LB." The US investment bank Keefe, Bruyette & Woods (KBW) believes that 27 banks will fail, but that German institutions will be particularly hard hit. KBW forecasts that eight banks in Germany won't pass the test, almost as many as in Italy and Spain combined.
Oh dear! You mean the debt-hating superior German race actually has the shittiest, least-capitalized, most-dangerous banks in the Eurozone? Worse than Italy and Spain? Oh my!

BI - copper futures fall. You think this is only due to bad export data, huh? Well, we'll see how smart you look a month from now, cheese.

WSJ India Realtime - El Nino will hurt Indian monsoon. That's why I'm not very positive gold after the April/May election season. The prediction might change, but if not, you've got to remember that Indian peasants are the ones who buy gold. If India stops buying due to a drought, and China starts dumping due to collateral seizure, you goldbugs are going to get anally romanced.

FT beyond brics - Indian CEOs on the election. That's nice and all that you clowns have opinions, but I know that the election results are determined locally by which candidate can buy people the most motorbikes.

ZeroHedge - what ten-baggers (and hundred-baggers!) look like. IKN this weekend inventoried his reasons for thinking we've already had the bottom in the juniors scene. Well, here's another bottom indicator for you: Casey Research is writing articles for ZeroHedge again, trying to lure a new crop of fools into their subscription service by promising ten-baggers.

Marginal Revolution - your porn is not Canadian enough. Hey, dudes, we've got CanCon regulations, and you agreed to them when you applied to the CRTC for your broadcast license, so quit whining. Personally, I'd be very happy to subscribe to your channels if you showed 8 hours a day of Ariel Rebel videos. Look her up, she's a little sweetie.

And yes, Ariel, I'd love to promote you on my blog in return for a free membership to your site! Plus a big hug and kiss.


  1. Otto is going to be ecstatic you tossed him in Casey's boat.

    1. He's too large for me to toss.

      I didn't toss him into Casey's boat btw. Reading comprehension fail.

    2. -Hey Beavis, he said that "he didn't toss him"
      -He did! He did!
      - Fnnnrnrrrrnnngggnmmrngggnrre